Homeward Bound: Why Women Are Embracing the New Domesticity by Emily Matchar

homeward bound It’s taken me longer than I thought to get through this book.  Mainly because of the Great Canadian Cheese Festival preparations took much of my time and brain power.  But I finally completed this book over a lunch hour this week.

I must admit, I began this book thinking I was going to find kindred spirits.  I was going to see women that were similar in thoughts and needs as myself and what I discovered about me, and them is that there are a number of differences!  I’ll start with what the book is about.  Then on to my personal take on it.

Emily Matchar noticed a startling number of blogs, books and women (mostly, anyway) returning to the domestic sphere and opting out of the general workforce.  She examines the history of woman’s work and feminism.  She interviews women who believe it’s most natural for them to rear the children, bake bread and do the housework.  She examines homesteading, frugality, parenting and the new hipster homemakers.

There is a wide variety of topics covered in this book and there were parts that intrigued me more than others.  I am not (nor plan to be) a mother and therefore the section on parenting was interesting from a bystander point of view, but it was 20 pages too long for me since I couldn’t relate.  I was, of course, very interested in the section on canning, DIY food and the culture surrounding it.  All in all I found the book to be well written, well researched and a good mix of historical references and current opinions from women who are actually part of the New Domesticity movement.

At first blush, I’m in total agreement with a number of these hipster homemaker women.  I wrote these thoughts last month and well, I can see the appeal.  What started to unsettle me was towards the end of the book.  Some of these women were totally and completely relying on their husbands to provide a paycheque to live on.  In a day and age where divorce is at an all-time high, why were these women giving up their ability to be self-sustaining?  And were these men perfectly happy to go to work all day while their wives stayed home?  Don’t mistake these questions as a belief that these women do nothing all day (I may not be a parent, but I’m not naïve to believe that these women are Peg Bundy eating bon bons).  What I’m really curious about is whether the relationships truly were fair and what would these women do if they found their marriage breaking down.  I’ve see it happen and it’s wound up as a struggle for money and a (mistaken) belief of what one is ‘owed’ after a relationship ends.

I would agree that their choices to bake their own bread, make all their food from their own garden and from scratch are great ways to spend their time, and in fact, I would love to do that myself!  But at the expense of not being able to contribute financially?  I would love to opt out of the working world and become an entrepreneur.  I want to earn my own money and I want to do it with My Guy.  It is a romanticized notion of what would actually be a lot of hard work, time and effort.  But I see us working together to earn a non-traditional living.  Not him as the breadwinner and me as the home one who cares for the home.

I grew up with a mother who made a very good living, a father who worked hard but for less money.  Both cooked, parented, struggled to make ends meet and both did house chores.  My Dad was more traditional in that he took lawn cutting, repairs and the typically masculine chores, while my Mom did laundry and vacuumed.  However both have and would pinch hit for the other when needed.  The marriage and responsibilities were equal when being divided.  Perhaps it’s this that has shaped my beliefs about why I would choose not to opt out of making a living.

I think Emily Matchar does a good job of representing both sides of this New Domesticity issue.  She shows those who are embracing it whole-heartedly, those who are not and in her conclusion makes those of us who wish to embrace it, feel ok about only going half way.  I strongly suggest every woman who has ever considered baking their own bread, knitting or throwing caution to the wind to grow all their own food and take a leave from the work force (permanent or temporary), to read this book.  You may come to the same answer and walk away from the corporate world, but at least Ms. Matchar will give you a history lesson and some things to consider.

The Great Canadian Cheese Festival in Picton, ON

I’m late in posting this, but I feel like it’s taken me this long to recover from my weekend in Picton, ON at The Great Canadian Cheese Festival.  It was a wonderful weekend to spend with food and wine lovers across Canada!

My prep for the event was long and a bit harried as I cooked (and cooked) and plotted the new design of the booth.  My Guy built a new sampling bench for me to display my wares on.  So not only was I feeling and looking in tip-top shape, but so was my booth!  My Guy and I had our jobs down to a science!

I was able to nip out a bit and some of the things I saw, tasted and drank were:

Best Baa Dairy – amazing goat’s milk cheeses! (My Guy bought some feta!)

Creemore Springs Brewery – love their Keillerbier!  Delicious unpasteurized beer J

Grange of Prince Edward County – Their pinot gris was my drink of choice on Saturday night!

Really Horrible Enterprises – this guy wears a kilt and has long hair!  Not only is vanilla my favourite scents and tastes, but how can you go wrong with that kind of name and presentation?

Quality Cheese – I tasked their smoked cheddar and brie and well, divine!

Queen of the Kitchen – some of the BEST chocolates I’ve ever eaten in my entire life.  And let me tell you!  I have eaten a lot of chocolate in my life!

I will definitely be back next year to the The Great Canadian Cheese Festival!  But I do think that next year, I’ll probably go early or stay later.  I did not have time to explore Picton and the rest of Prince Edward County and it truly was a beautiful area!

 

Locavore: From Farmers Fields To Rooftop Gardens, How Canadians Are Changing The Way We Eat

 “A locavore is a person interested in eating food that is locally produced, not moved long distances to market. The locavore movement in the United States and elsewhere was spawned as interest in sustainability and eco-consciousness became more prevalent.” (Wikipedia).

Sarah Elton

Sarah Elton

I’ve just finished reading this book and my mind is still reeling with all the information, stories and people the author, Sarah Elton, wrote about.  Sarah Elton begins the book by writing about a cookie her daughter brings home from a party.  While reading the ingrediants on the back, Ms. Elton learns that the cookie was made in China, not a local bakery as she’d assumed.  This begins her journey of exploring how people across Canada are farming, selling and cooking food they or others close by, raise and grow.

Elton focuses mainly on Canada with a few examples drawn from the US.  She begins in New Brunswick with several families struggling to make ends meet while solely relying on a farm income to live on.  She is able to show their struggles and their passion for the food and way of life they live.  Elton moves her way across Canada, East to West, focusing each chapter on the different provinces and regions our diverse country has.  She touches on Quebec’s hand crafted cheese industry, Ontario’s movement towards agriculture programs for second careerists and internships.  Then she heads to Saskatchewan to explore the wheat industry and the revival of Red Fife Wheat, finally landing in BC where she explores restaurants that proclaim their support for local farmers across their menus.

Sustainability is part of the conversation Sarah Elton has in this book.  The idea that the food grown, bought, sold and eaten locally must also be done sustainably is explored as well.  There is talk of organics although I felt it was done in a peripheral way.  But she did go into gardening/farming in urban settings, greenhouses and what the future of that might look like.  I felt as though sustainability could have been a bigger part of the book, however, it may have changed the intention of the book.

Another notion that is posited, is that when we choose to eat locally most of the time, it does allow us to make choices from the global food locavore-199x300 market on occasion.  Avocados are her example of eating from a global market.  It’s unlikely they will be grown here in Canada, but if most of our food is sourced from our communities or provinces, then purchasing the odd product that has traveled thousands of miles is less of an impact.  Given that we have all become accustomed to eating a wide variety of food due to easier modes of transportation, immigration and globalization in general, removing those foods from our diets is just not reasonable.

I felt as though Elton’s purpose was to bring attention to the movement and provoke thought, discussion and consciousness of the issues and that she did a good job of bringing to light questions and different aspects of the locavore movement.  In general it has caused me to contemplate my food choices, where I succeed and where improvement is more than possible.  I’m not going to stop buying from the global market, there’s just too many things that I enjoy eating that don’t come from Ontario, let alone Canada.  However I am interested in investing more time and sweat-energy in producing my own food and/or purchasing from local farmers.  I will also spend more time looking at the signage around my grocery store and visiting farmer’s markets.

 

Have you changed the way you purchase food?  Do you prefer to support your local farms?

What Would You Do With $1,000,000.00?

Photo by Dani Simmons

Photo by Dani Simmons

I saw this question somewhere and wondered what would I do?  A million dollars can be a lot of money depending on what you’d do with it!  And an extra twist is to spend or give it to others.  I can’t keep one cent of it.  Here’s what I would do with my million.

$75,000 I would give my sister the money pay off her student debts.  Student debt is increasing and the debt load that graduates carry can haunt them into their 40’s.  I was fortunate enough to not have that debt and to help her out, I would pay it off so she can start fresh.

$5,000 My sister-in-law deserves a spa weekend away from her husband and kids.  I would give her a supply of books, movies, massages and facials.  Shelley works very hard and with 2 kids, a husband, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 7 ducks, a pony, goat and miniature donkey she has a lot on her plate.  I would send her off for two whole days of peace and quiet to read, eat and sleep.  She loves her family very much but she, like most Moms, is the central person in all that her family does.  Between scheduling vet visits for the animals, keeping track of her kids socks and shoes and planning the meals, she often forgets about herself.  I would want to give her a few days to herself, to refresh and rejuvenate.

$100,000 I would donate to the local food bank in my community.  Although I live in a rural area, I am attached to a larger community with a large homeless population and a large population of people who have a hard time providing for their families.  I give the money in hopes that it would provide enough food for everyone, if only for a short time.

$100,000 Kids need to eat to grow, attend school and flourish.  When they go to school hungry they can’t learn.  Their bodies and brains need good food!  Donating to a local school boards food programs would be a wonderful way to give to the next generation and help those in need.  Kids are unable to do much to help their situation and end up victims of circumstance.  Programs like these help them get or stay on track.  And maybe one day, one of these kids that is being helped now, will help others later on.

$20,000 A farmer’s market is a great way to meet your local farmers and get to know where your food comes from.  There are local markets around but I find the ones I see are when I’m at work!  A Thursday afternoon is great, except for those people who work until 5pm and can’t get there.  I would love to see an evening market in the summer to bring my community together and celebrate the food that is being grown around us.

$100,000 My church provides a number of outreach services to the local community that they serve.  Besides their shelters and food programs, they also have one of the largest kids programs I’ve ever heard of.  They provide sports, learning opportunities and programs for at-risk youth.  Giving to my church would help increase those opportunities for people and for my congregation to show up more.

$200,000 The Cleft Lip and Palate Team in Hamilton (CLP) is near and dear to me.  My sister and my Guy were both born with cleft lip and palates.  Though they were treated in different hospitals (the Hamilton team didn’t exist yet when My Guy was born) this cause is near and dear to me.  My sister and My Guy had a lot of surgeries, healing to do and our families needed support while it was all happening.

$200,000 Juravinski Cancer Centre is where my Grandmother, Mom, and My Guy’s parents went for their treatments.  As well as several other people who are near and dear to me.  The nurses, doctors and all the staff that work there make a very difficult time for the patients and families easier to cope with.  There’s a lot of money that goes to cancer research and frankly, they still don’t have it figured out.  But I would want my money to go to a place I’ve seen firsthand make a very scary time in people’s lives less scary.  They are sympathetic and empathetic people who do amazing work!

$200,000 I’d really like to use the last of this money to invest in my own farm with My Guy because that’s our dream.  But because I can’t keep any of this money for myself, I think I’d give it to friends of my family who run a local farm, The Boar & Chick.  They are amazing, wonderful people who have a fabulous farm, the best worth ethic around and some of the cutest animals I’ve ever seen!  I love Tania and Mark and I believe in what they’re doing for their farming community and people.  They love working their farm and bringing good food to people.  I’d give my last $200,000 to help them get their farm out there and put all their dreams into action.  They’ve earned it!

That’s where my money would go if I were given a million dollars!

I’ll be honest, if I had a million and COULD spend it on myself, I would still do a lot of the things on this list.  It’s nice to be able to give to others and help out people who need a boost now and then.  I would however take some of the money and put it into my dream farm.  I would use the money to purchase land and animals.

How would you spend your fantasy million?

10 Things I Believe

I believe that

The New Domesticity and My Desire to Opt-Out

Last night I came across a reporter, Emily Matchar, who has written a book about what she calls the new domesticity movement, Homeward Bound: Why Women are Embracing the New Domesticity  (Pre-order here: Amazon.com, Amazon.ca – not affiliate links).  She has been writing about this movement which she calls the new domesticity.  In a nutshell, it’s the return of (mostly, but not all) women to domestic pursuits.  This may or may not be for money, although often it would seem in the media as though it is.

This would include women opening cupcakeries, selling on Etsy, mom/baby related creations, lifestyle blogging and a large variety of things that I cannot even begin to name.  I am one of these women.  I do work in a traditional workplace but I would give anything to leave it for good and spend my days gathering chicken eggs, preserving my garden’s bounty for selling and raising my own animals.  Let me tell you why.

As a 30-something unmarried woman, I have post-secondary education and I’ve been working in offices since high school (part-time, then full-time).  I had this impression that work meant financial freedom, a purpose and a chance to do something in the world.  Instead, the longer I am in a traditional job, the more disillusioned I have become.

Like most people, I have had my fair share of bad bosses and lousy workplaces and this likely has contributed to the disillusionment.  I’ve put in overtime, I’ve busted my hump to meet unrealistic deadlines, I’ve interrupted my vacation to stay on top of emails and work demands and I’ve woke up at 2am in a panic because I can’t remember if I sent off a report that was due.  And when all is said and done work has responded by limiting my training opportunities, freezing my wages and assigning me more work because someone quit and they aren’t replacing them.

The Appeal of Opting Out

flare-iphoto-export-361327741 Opting out of the traditional workforce appeals to my desire to control my own destiny.  I acknowledge that my earnings may be far lower than I earn now, but I would have control over my days and the effort I put in, in theory, I would reap the benefits of.  At work I can control things only so far and while I always have a choice, often my choices are do it or find another job.  When you are a business owner you may work much harder than in a tradition job but since it’s your business you are able exert more control and direction over it.

I am a ‘paper pusher’ in my traditional job.  But I push virtual paper.  I spend my entire day in front of the computer and I interact with people via email and phones.  The documents I print are printed to PDF, not paper.  Essentially I produce nothing tangible.  I’m not complaining about that.  I actually hate paper and offices with folders and files full of it drive me crazy.  But when I go home and whip up a batch of relish I have a tangible product of my efforts.  I have something I can hold in my hands and know that I’ve created.

I also can get a batch of relish together in just a few hours.  If anyone has spent much time in the corporate world you know that things do not go quickly.  Being able to go from bushels of vegetables and fruit to a jar of something yummy gives me a sense of accomplishment.  I can say not only that I did something, but I can do it in a single night.

At work it’s a never-ending cycle of emails and voicemails.  I often feel as though a job is never really done.  There are always loose strings, unanswered questions and each turn brings up a new set of What Ifs that need to be explored.  When you’re canning and all the relish or jam is in the jars, you’re done.  If one doesn’t seal, the solution is simple, you put it in the fridge and eat it first.  You get to start and finish the task and if something happens, like an unsealed jar, the answer is much easier to deal with.

Something that is perhaps more unique to me than others feeling like they IMG_0642 want to opt out is that I really do come from a family that cans their own tomatoes, made their own freezer jam, pickled cucumbers and stocked a pantry with mason jars.  Not because Pinterest said it was cool but because those mason jars were used year after year to hold food that our family would eat.  My grandmothers canned because they had to, my Mom did it because the food tasted better and  I do it as a connection to my family, traditions and heritage.  I much prefer tomatoes out of my garden than the funny pink ones that resemble cardboard in flavour and texture.

All in all, working in more domestic or home-focused spheres holds the appeal of a calmer, gentler life that is less dominated by demands of a boss or company.  It would increase my connection to the production of the food I consume, the community I live in and put a greater distance between me and the rat race.

How Traditional Workplaces Could Keep Me

To keep me at work, not just physically, but mentally too, a workplace is going to have to do a lot to keep me and the rest of people who feel like I do, around.  Our desire to escape runs deep.

I want flexible hours.  Not just flexible around a core set of hours, but rather, I want to be able to work at 7am in my yoga pants at my kitchen table when my best ideas strike.  I want to be able to leave work at 3pm when I’ve had enough of my desk chair that is just not that comfortable.  Since I rarely produce anything physically tangible, there’s no reason a cell phone and a laptop couldn’t be arranged.  In fact, if my phone were a cell and my computer were a lap top, you’d actually have no idea where I was.  And for the record, most people don’t know where my desk actually is.

 

I want to be treated with respect and acknowledgment for the work I do.  Although something is my job, a ‘thank you’ would be wonderful now and then, especially when I meet a tight deadline or deal with a challenging situation.  No fanfare required, just ‘Hey, thanks so much for getting this done!”   I’d also like to work in a place where I’m not guilty until proven innocent.

 

I also want to be communicated with about my job and the things that affect it.  So often and in so many different organizations the number one thing wrong is the lack of communication.  I have had employees in other countries and locations tell me how my job is changing, long before my boss tells me.

 

I want to work for people and organizations that are open-minded and have a desire to move forward with the times rather than do things as they always have, simply because that’s the way it’s always been.  I’m not a fan of change for the sake of change, but there does become a point when the same old thing should be updated just to keep up with times.

 

Making My Soul Smile

If I could opt out of a traditional job today, I would do it in a heartbeat.  There is something earthy and grounding about the thought of chucking my well-paying, secure employment out the window and donning my Crocs and jeans every day and tromping out to the chicken coop.  I know My Guy has the same dream and if we can figure out how to really make it work, we would walk away from our traditional jobs.  Living may be sparse and I may not have the cash flow I once did but I feel like my soul would smile more.

Favourite Recipe: Crazy Cake

Growing up my Mom was not a baker.  She cooked very well but she was not an elaborate baker.  But she had a few standby recipes that were just amazing!  One of them was called Crazy Cake.  I have no idea where the name came from, except I think it may have been crazy because it was so simple to make it was CRAZY!  When Mom had a hankering for something sweet she would whip up this chocolate cake.  Crazy Cake is a single layer, no frosting required, chocolate cake that is made with cocoa.  It’s the cocoa that gives it such a rich chocolate flavour.  It’s not overly sweet and its dead simple to make.  Growing up we would do everything we could to cool the cake off faster so we could cut into it.  We would put it in the fridge (and be told to take it out, we were heating up the milk), we would stuff it in the freezer (and be told to take it out, we were making the freezer run more and that costs money!) finally we would set it outside and hope that our cake didn’t lick it!

crazycake

I wish I had a good picture I’ve taken but sadly I ate it all before I could remember to take a photo.  So… I have found Crazy Cake online but called One Bowl Chocolate Cake.  I think Crazy Cake just sounds so much more fun, don’t you?

Recipe for my Mom’s Crazy Cake

  • 1 cups white sugar

  • 1 cups all-purpose flour

  • 2 heaping tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

  • 1 teaspoon baking powder

  • 1 teaspoon baking soda

  • 1/2 teaspoon salt

  • 1 egg

  • 1/2 cup milk

  • 1/3 cup vegetable oil

  • 1 teaspoons vanilla extract

  • 1/2 cup boiling water

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease and flour one nine inch pan.
  2. Stir together the sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Add the eggs, milk, oil and vanilla, mix for 2 minutes on medium speed of mixer. Stir in the boiling water last. Batter will be thin. Pour into your pan
  3. Bake 30 to 35 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean. Cool in the pans while you try and resist cutting into it and devouring the entire thing in one swoop.

Smoking Salmon

Salmon in a brine of salt, sugar, celery, onion and garlic

Salmon in a brine of salt, sugar, celery, onion and garlic

My Guy is in love with his homemade smoker.  It’s a combination of an upright bbq and a smoker.  If the air holes are left open, it’s a bbq, if plugged with tinfoil, it’s a smoker.  Either way, the food that comes out is amazing.  And we can cook for a crowd!

We started by submerging the salmon in a brine for about 6 hours.  We then headed off to the One of Kind Show in Toronto to check out the amazing artists and crafters!  What we found was inspiration for what to do with the smoked salmon, and of course more projects we want to try out!  Incidentally, if you get a chance to go, I highly recommend you stock a bag with snacks (line ups for food was ridiculous) and don’t bring fussy kids!  It’s busy and there’s so much to look at.  2 hours in and My Guy and I hadn’t seen the whole thing!  Patience is highly important when checking out the food.  Everyone wants samples!

My Guy bought me my very own giant mug.  I absolutely love it!  He has an entire cupboard of gorgeous pottery mugs that My new blue mug were something his parents collected on various trips.  While I think they are beautiful, none of them are a good size for my coffee in the morning except for one.  Which he happens to like too!  So rather than argue over one mug, we now have two!

We smoked and barbecued ribs that turned out to be amazing.  Some of My Guy’s best ever!  While we munched on ribs and a macaroni salad, My Guy filled the smoker with applewood chips and off it went!  It was a beautiful smell and sight to watch the salmon cold smoke its way to perfection.  You could likely achieve a similar set of results with wood chips and a barbecue but you would have to get the chips to smoke just so, rather than burning up or not going at all.

Mix up the cream cheese, heavy cream and lemon juice

Mix up the cream cheese, heavy cream and lemon juice

Once the salmon was out of the smoker we got inspired to make a salmon dip.  It came from tasting a lobster mousse at The One of a Kind show.  Since neither of us had lobster at hand, we decided smoked salmon was perfect!  I pulled out the mixer, cream cheese, diced onion, lemon juice, heavy cream and plenty of black pepper.  After whizzing that up, I added quite a bit of the salmon.

Because I didn’t rinse the brine off before we smoked the salmon, it was somewhat salty.  So instead, I added a ton of cracked black pepper and kept mixing it until the very large chunks of salmon were broken up.  Then the key was to let it sit.  The flavours needed time to mix, tango together and create a yummy dip.

IMG_0598

I promise you, this is a hit at any party!  Make this dip in a jiffy and the best part is that it’s even better if it sits for a few hours or over night.  You could use canned salmon, or just plain cooked salmon.  But if you feel adventurous, the smoking gives it a great flavour!

The basic recipe is below, but add in onions, green or red peppers for a new dimension!  Serve with crackers or veggies such as carrots, cucumbers or celery for an awesome appetizer!

Smoke Salmon Dip recipe

It’s True, I am Kind of a Big Deal Here

I am a big deal

Changes to my Twitter Accounts!

Ahhh, the time has come that I must make a decision about my Twitter accounts.  I live a double life – I work in Human Resources Monday through Friday, 8 to 5, but nights and weekends I am the Country Girl behind Country Girl Cooks!  My Twitter streams have been relatively easy to manage up to this point.  But now the time has come where I must create a new Twitter account or pick a ‘life’ to be online.  I can’t choose, so I’m creating a new Twitter account for my Day Time Life in HR.

For anyone who’s been confused by my tweets (one way or another) have no fear!  If you follow me because of this website, promotional materials for Country Girl Cooks etc., I will still be tweeting on my regular account @KarenCHyde.  I will be attempting to migrate all of my HR tweets, follows and followers over to my NEW Twitter account @KarenCHydeHR over the next few weeks.  Bare with me and what may end up being numerous Tweets to hopefully capture everyone.  :)

Hopefully this will help me not only keep up with the wide variety of news and information that interests me, but also be able to give you easy to understand Tweets that are relevant to what you’re there for!